The Revelation: Eyes on the prize

Hello, my name is Michelle and I have a whole in my heart….now that wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be!

Once, actually a couple of times, I went to the doctors and they told me I had a heart murmur (a hole in my heart) but I thank God for putting the enemy to shame. After further scans and labs they found nothing of that nature.

With that situation, God was trying to show me things that I was either oblivious to or just plain refused to acknowledge. One of those things was trust.

After being hurt and hurting others it was kinda hard to place all your trust in this one person even when you know He is the only one capable of being good & perfect. It’s like I can’t trust myself or others, but here comes Jesus saying “I know you've been playing around in this roller-coaster ride you call religion, but I want something more with you”

Before being healed, my faith was tested at that moment, because I had only two options one of which was trust that God is who He says He is, and the other was don’t trust Him but try to see if you can do it on your own. God reminded me of what He did for me as a little girl.

Okay, so story time (I love telling stories if you hadn't guessed already lol) when I was probably about 8 or so my grandmother fell ill. My family went over to see her and I remember us just looking at her and I asked everyone to leave the room so I could pray for her. When they left I asked her to kneel on the ground, then I stretched out my little hands on her head and asked the Lord to heal her. I was completely, without a doubt in my heart sure that Jesus was able to do anything and the next day my grandma was well.

Sometimes we have to reach back into what God has done for us to remember that He is able, because it’s so easy to be focused on what you can see in front of you.

Now fast forward to when I was given the news about the murmur. I made a decision to put my trust in God and He healed me, whilst showing me that I needed to learn to trust Him in every aspect of my life.

Another thing God used the situation to bring to my attention was that there has been a spiritual hole deep in my heart that needed healing. Because He knew how visually immersed I could get; He let my attention be caught in the physical first and then used it to show me the real problem.

This hole begun to form long before I even knew how a heart worked, or its usefulness in my body. As a result of this hole, this empty space in my heart, I would always feel incomplete. I tried to fill it thinking that maybe always having someone interested, some kind of best friend, people blowing up my phone, or a relationship; I still felt alone. I wanted more and I made myself believe that the more I was seeking for was God when really it wasn't. In reality I just didn't want to be alone, I wanted God so He could be my personal ATM machine and get me what I really wanted, His creations/ ‘Adam’/a best friend/ a clique.

God cannot be deceived, no matter how much we think we can manipulate Him. He created us and he knows everything about us and I do mean everything. He sees it before it even happens, how can we think we can hide our motives from Him?

Jeremiah 17:10
“But I, the Lord, search all hearts and examine secret motives. I give all people their due rewards, according to what their actions deserve.”

For so long I tried to cover this hole in my heart with everything else but the piece that was actually missing. Just like a puzzle, each piece takes a certain shape and to make it whole you have to place shapes together that complement themselves to complete the puzzle. No matter how much we think a piece looks much better than the piece that was intended to fill a spot; it can never be a substitute or give that puzzle more meaning than the original piece intended to fill that space.

It was the same thing for my heart. I lost sight of what my focus should have been and I was looking to fill the space that only God can occupy with other things; it’s no wonder I felt so incomplete.

It’s no wonder I was living less than, and this is usually the point where we begin to blame the enemy but truth be told, we make the decisions. Just the same way when I was first given the news about the hole in my heart, I decided to go with God, I also have been given that option every day and so have you.

I’m sure people are wondering well how this even fits in with the part of the title that reads “eyes on the prize”?

Well, I made myself believe that I was chasing after God to fill that void, to heal me, and to complete me. I was in this facade I had created with Jesus starring on the front page of my life as my always and forever. But a facade is just what it is, it’s not real! It’s a method of hiding behind a front so you don’t deal with the real issue. Jesus wasn't the prize I was running the race to win, He wasn't my focus and until I accepted that something needed to be changed, then I could never heal.

As human beings, we tend to do some crazy things just because we don’t want to be alone or separated from everyone else; we want to feel loved, apart of something bigger than us, and to change the world!If you look at the bible, being alone is not a bad thing as evidenced through people like Noah and Abraham who God gave instructions when they were by themselves. You are never really alone, God is always, and I do mean always there no matter what. So my focus and the focus of us all should be Jesus, not the stuff He brings but Him.

If we can change our focus we will have a lot more peace of mind because the actions of others or even ourselves won’t slow us down, as we would be so engulfed in His being we wouldn't take notice of anything He didn't approve. The reason most of us tend to dwell on what is wrong with us is highly correlated to our main focus. When our eyes are set on the “real prize” we wouldn't have time to dwell on the other stuff because we would be so lost in His presence and know without a doubt that He is able to do exceeding abundantly everything we could ever think or ask, including repair our hearts and make them whole (Ephesians 3:20)

Beauty in the process

I’m not sure if it’s just me, but when I think about times God has done something amazing for me I tend to focus solely on the ‘aftermath’. For example, God delivered me from depression. The thing I deemed as ‘amazing’ or ‘beautiful’ was the depression leaving but never appreciated the process by which the depression left.

Don’t get me wrong, it is great when God delivers you from something you never thought you could beat, but why should we only acknowledge Him for the final product?

Most times our minds trap us with the fact that the devil is throwing different circumstances at us to test us, but we forget that God will not allow us to be tested more than we are equipped to handle (1 Corinthians 10:13) Meaning that before that problem arose the Lord approved it, so it is going to work out for our good.

Take for example the story of Job in the bible; God even referred him to the devil to be tested. Some might question God saying “why would he put Job out there like that” or even go as far as telling God not to refer them. Yea I was one of those people..

But, He changed my mindset

God has been working on me lately on the power and blessing attached to the process. Honestly, I sometimes would much rather skip the process and fast forward to the part where I overcome, why? Well, those who have been through it or are going through it could probably also testify that pruning is painful.

Pruning is defined as the cutting away of things that are dead or overgrown in order to increase fruitfulness and growth.

As a believer it is necessary to be pruned by the Lord because not only were we born sinners, but for some of us prior to giving out lives fully to the Lord, and/or even during our walk with the Lord we have acquired some STUFF. If God doesn't cut off those things that are stunting our growth then no fruit would be produced; we would practically be useless, like nails with no hammer.

It’s just like running track; there is a path you have to take to get to the finish line right? You can’t win if you don’t take the path; taking the path brings about the victory. So basically:

No path = No victory

You get the picture?

See, the process shows you what you’re made of, and who God is as well who He can be in your life. A healer, restorer, protector, deliverer and so much more! But without the process you wouldn’t be able to experience God in His entirety.

I know it hurts, and sometimes the process beats you to the ground but it cannot keep you on there because God is God in EVERY situation. Stand up, dust yourself up, and with the strength of God keep moving.

So next time you face a situation, remember that God is using the process to beautify you, to cleanse you from the innermost depths of your being, so that both on the inside and outside you are a spitting image of Him.

Romans 5:2-4
“ through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we[b] boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we[c] also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us”

Don’t wait till the finish line to give God praise thank Him from the starting line till the finish line for how magnificent He is.

CHRONICLES OF A WANDERING MIND

Lately I have been battling in my mind. I don’t know how many people have felt like this, but there are just some thoughts that come across my mind that make me ashamed. The creativity of one’s mind can be a good thing, but when you open it up to things of this world, the enemy will have a blast with it!

Not until recently did I finally accept that I had to not only faithfully guard my heart, but my mind. God showed me that it’s really the things we pay the least attention to that affect us. The enemy is a con-artist! It could start from just starring at a picture for a split second, I mean you kept scrolling but it might be too late. By then that image has been registered in a minuscule section of your brain. At this point you think you've forgotten about it and then BOOM! You listen to a song and that image reappears in your mind and it’s now more vivid than ever.

That thought in collaboration with the song could open the door for unholy thoughts, desires, and it awakens things hidden deep within you that you might have tried to suppress.  This is a REAL life struggle for not just the body of Christ, but people in general. People are struggling daily with this battle and losing, because no one is willing to come forth.

The devil cannot hold it over your head when you admit you have a problem, but trying to defend the sin will give him space to mess with your thoughts. The word says to lay all our burdens at the feet of God and He will give us rest, and it’s not like He doesn't already know but He wants to be invited to control the issue.

In my case, I still went on doing what I was doing, and exposing my mind to things that I knew could corrupt my thoughts. I tried to make myself believe that God will stop me by himself and I didn't have to do anything on my part. FALSE!

Really God doesn't need our help, but He also doesn't need us being deliberate hindrances to our own progress. I understand that after being exposed to certain atmospheres, places, music, movies, social media sites or whatever it kinda becomes addictive in a sense. It’s like cocaine, nobody ever started out saying they wanted to be a drug addict, but with one inhale and then another, POOF, it became their reality. But the good news is that Jesus is bigger than any of these things, I mean we are talking about a God that resurrected Himself from the grave; He is surely able to do ALL things.

What is interesting is that I use to be one to argue that just thinking about something sinful isn't bad as long as you don’t put it into action, but again that is FALSE!

Proverbs 23:7 says “for as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he. He says to you ‘eat and drink!’ but his heart is not with you”

I learnt the hard way that I am just as guilty as the person who committed sin physically even if I only thought about cussing someone out in my mind. I made myself believe they were just thoughts, but they eventually manifested in the physical when I would say out loud what I was thinking. It hardly ever went down well, and it hurt more because I knew I could have avoided the situation if I repented when it was still a thought. I heard someone preaching on TBN once and he said something that stuck with me “you can never change what you tolerate”

2 Corinthians 10:5 states “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take into captivity every thought to make it obedient to Christ”

Meaning that immediately those thoughts come across your mind or you find yourself in a compromising situation instead of brushing it aside or running away, stand firm! You have been given that power to speak to the thought before it becomes an action and cast it into to pits of hell. The same resurrecting power that JESUS has, you have it too. With faith as small as a mustard seed you can command your righteous mind, the mind that God originally intended for us, to be resurrected.

As the body we are in this together, so if anyone needs prayers or has more questions just comment below or message me on Facebook. Stays encouraged, and remember that nothing can separate us from the love of God.

Be blessed!

Perfumed corpse

What does change mean in the context of Christianity? It’s the death of the “old man” and the introduction of the new man resurrected by the blood of Jesus Christ. It’s interesting that even after we claim we have undergone this “change” we still operate in the “old man” mentality. Before we meet Jesus we are basically walking corpses in disguise. As the Apostle Paul said “..to live is Christ..” meaning that if you claim you are living, but it’s not in Christ you are “dead”. The reason we can’t see it is because it’s not a physical death, it’s a spiritual death but so many of us fall into this category as we have found a way to cover up our stench. We cloth it with trendy accessories and garments, we spray it with “overconfidence” “pride” “I don’t care attitude” “false love” and the list goes on. What’s sad is that even after all this you’re still dead; a walking glorified corpse.

Even those of us who have been saved for a while fall into this category, because our change is outward and not inward. Someone told me how his dad would say to him when he tried to minster “just got here, can’t tell been here nothing”

We ALL need to constantly do a self-check, remember that God is not a respecter of time, or age. So just because we have been there doesn’t mean we learnt the lesson yet. The Israelite's even after their experiences with God refused to learn the new lesson He was teaching, and this resulted in them walking in circles for 40 years. In Joel 2:13 the word says:

         

        Rip the wickedness out of your hearts; don’t just tear your clothing.

Meaning that just because we put up a front to make the world think that we sanctimonious doesn't mean that we can deceive God. HE looks right at our hearts and knows what is inside it. Just cause we claim to love our brother because we share our possessions with them doesn't mean it was acceptable in the sight of God. If our heart was not on the same page as our action it’s useless. No, I’m not trying to put you down I’m trying to get God’s message across to everyone including myself. He wants us to align our hearts with His word and truly accept the resurrection He has been offering us.

See resurrection starts from the inside really, it’s our spirit man that went to sleep when Adam and Eve fell that God wants to awaken. The flesh is deceptive, but the spirit represents the direct link between mankind to God Almighty Himself!

Let us STOP trying hard to be a part of this world that we have clearly been set apart from. Luke 11:33-36

“You need a light to see. Only an idiot would light a lamp and then put it beneath the floor or under a bucket. No, any intelligent person would put the lamp on a table so everyone who comes in the house can see. ³⁴ Listen, your eye, your outlook, the way you see is your lamp. If your way of seeing is functioning well, then your whole life will be enlightened. But if your way of seeing is darkened, then your life will be a dark, dark place. ³⁵ So be careful, people, because your light may be malfunctioning. ³⁶ If your outlook is good, then your whole life will be bright, with no shadowy corners, as when a radiant lamp brightens your home.”

From this verse we can see that the kind of change we need starts from the inside which in turn reflects on the outside. One thing I have come to understand is that we as humans only see what we want to see and we can benefit from this. Let’s ask God to help us align our hearts and thoughts in accordance to His word, so that our outlook on life can be in line with His divine will. After we allow Him truly come into us, we won’t have to try to make ourselves look “righteous” or “good enough” cause it will be reflected in our reaction to life.

No man knows the hour or the time that Jesus will return. It will suck to deceive ourselves that we are a reflection of God, whereas the whole time we have been the very thing we told others not to be; a walking glorified corpse. Be encouraged my brother and sisters! Christ has given us the strength to be exactly who He called us to be as long as we ask in prayer. Don't give up and settle for an imitation of God's glory reflected through us, but remember that we are more than conquerors through Jesus Christ. The king of Kings is soon to return, let’s get ready!

To every "ordinary" boy and girl

One of the most beautiful things that can happen to a person is to be used by God, but it’s also one of the scariest. Why is it scary you ask? Well it’s because we know that we are sinners, we fall more often than we should, and our minds cannot understand why God, as majestic as He is would even consider using such an unworthy vessel. See, some even believe that for God to use a person they have to possess faith that is out of this world, be strong, be brave, be bold, and be 'perfect'. Well, I have news for every "ordinary" boy and girl out there feeling that way...THAT IS A LIE! GOD says in His word there is none without sin, but if you check every person in the bible HE never used someone who met every single one of the criteria mentioned above; HE never used a “perfect” person. In fact every person used in the bible by God had some kind of flaw all except Jesus, because HE is God the all-knowing and PERFECT one!

Starting from the Old Testament God used Moses despite his hot temper to part the red sea, to perform miracles, and bring the Israelite's out of bondage. HE anointed David as King despite his lust for women, and used him to win many battles for Israel. In the New Testament we see the disciples who saw Jesus, knew who HE was, but still denied and doubted Jesus were still used to not only perform miracles but went on to write a significant portion of the new testament. Remember how Paul was persecuting thousands of Christians, but was after his encounter with God became one of the most radical spokesperson for the gospel of Jesus Christ. He literally wrote a significant portion of the New Testament, so my point is that all these people had flaws, baggage, but GOD saw past that exterior and looked right at their hearts.

GOD is not a respecter of issues in fact it’s that broken man or woman, girl or boy that HE wants to use. Think about it, how can HIS glory be seen through a perfect vessel? HE is still in the business of using people who others have counted out as "no good", or "worthless" because only then can HE show His competence. There is no one who is perfect but the Lord, so my brothers and sisters let’s quit looking at our leaders or people God has appointed as gods. The glory you see radiating from them is nothing short of a portion of the magnificence of our God. If you take away God from the equation you will see an "ordinary" person just like you and me with flaws and baggage.

Romans 9:30-32 "What then shall we say? That the Gentiles, who did not pursue righteousness, have obtained it, a righteousness that is by faith, but the people of Israel, who pursued the law as the way of righteousness, have not attained their goal. Why not? Because they pursued it not by faith but as if it were by works. They stumbled over stumbling stone"

It is so easy to fall into the trap of trying to be righteous by our own strength, but from the verse above we see that we cannot attain it by ourselves. If we could, then we wouldn't need God. The only way anyone can truly be righteous is by having faith in the only one who is righteous, Jesus, and letting Him shine his righteousness through our vessels. Let Him work through you, because we honestly don't know how to be righteous. So let’s not give up on our calling because we feel like we are not up to par. To all the "ordinary" people out there just like me, give it up to God and have faith that HE will work through you, so that when the world gets a glance of you they will see an exact reflection of JESUS CHRIST.

Ready or not ?

Last year went by so fast it was quite unbelievable! Seems like just yesterday the Lord spoke to me concerning starting my blog, and at first i ran (figuratively speaking). People would ask why are you running from God? I will tell you the real reason i ran is because i understood when you are given a mantle it comes with "other stuff" as well. Its not always smooth sailing cause sometimes there are trials, attacks from the enemy, dry seasons, but 2012 has taught me one thing which i want us all to take into high account in 2013.

                                                    IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU!!!

Here i was complaining (i really was lol ) about all these things i didn't like that came with the mantle until God shook me to get my attention. I was so busy paying attention to the mere surface issues that i lost sight of the real REASON for everything--JESUS!

I was beginning to forget i was only a VESSEL and HE is the only SOURCE by which the blessings come from so in other words this whole cycle exists because HE made it so hence HE is the creator of the vessel, the SOURCE and the REAL writer and i'm just a channel  <--Read it again

This is applicable to our entirety is the sense that God is the true source but we get so big-headed sometimes that we that thinking we are in charge but really we have NO strength of our own.

See even when the enemy was sending things my way i let it get to me because i thought he was after me but if you really think about it the enemy is after the Christ that is in you not your flesh that's going to perish. The enemy knows that if he can cause the Christ in you to decrease by invoking fear, weariness, doubt, and all those seeds that are not of God that would cause us to be empty so much that we will revert to how we used to be before we truly let Jesus into our lives.

I was reading this really awesome book called "The Purpose Driven Life- what am I here on earth for?" by Rick Warren (which i highly recommend  cause it gives good insight) and it caused me to really get deeper with my self-reflections. The reason why so many of us are lost is because we have woven ourselves a fake reality that revolves around a "ME" mentality, but the truth is we were created to give glory to God. Now just like most people we have this fixed or standard notion of how to we are supposed to act with God things to do to please Him. Yes not all of that is wrong but we have become so used to doing those things out of  compulsion rather than LOVE. And bearing in mind that we are doing the right things our hearts are not in it so it is basically a waste.

Usually every new year its almost like tradition to make new year resolutions and I have been having this urge in me to really work on Loving GOD, not His gifts but Him. Many of us think we Love Him but our hearts are far off rather we are just scared of going to hell so we do things we think will keep us from going to hell. I WAS ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE! No need to front because God knows our heart.

I asked myself a question--how would you feel is someone you loved with everything claimed to love you but really they just loved what you could give them? It would SUCK big time! But we do it to God and maybe we think He is some robotic character up in heaven that wouldn't miss our love because there are a lot of other people giving it to Him but YOU'RE WRONG!

Jesus came to die on the cross to die for the remission of our sins but the blood was not to collectively wash the sins of mankind but individually erase each and everyone of our personal sins. So if God could send His only Son to do that then what makes us think our loving Him wouldn't amount to much? He actually longs for us to love Him truly and with every fiber in us!

Now the question is how do we make this race about God and also truly love Him?
  -well first of all we can start by including Him in every decision, activity, conversation, thought in order words everything! We need to seek His opinion and go His route whether we understand or not because His way always works out for our good. I have discovered that if we make the race about Him we would have less problems really because our eyes would be focused totally on Him and His word, not the world, not ourselves, friends, significant others but GOD!
  -For us to truly love God we first off need to get on our knees and pray to Him to help us do it! Then lets spend meaningful time with Him by reading His word to know more about Him and NOT to fulfill all righteousness like we sometimes do. Even with human beings when we fall in-love by learning about the person and bearing in mind they have faults we can SURELY fall in-love with someone who is impeccable!

When you look at it both points tie together in the sense that when we make our race more about God we will spend almost all our time if not all with Him which will cause us to know Him better hence we will get to love Him even more! God, from what i have experienced is just full of amazing surprises when you really let Him have His way, so this year I hope you all join me on my quest to fall in TOTAL LOVE with God. I want Him to be the reason for my smile, butterflies in my stomach, my breathe, my passion, desire, and i want Him to have not just some, but ALL of my heart!

It will be a journey but i'm telling you God is without a doubt worth every bit of it :)
Happy New Years and I pray God Almighty Himself blesses each and everyone of you with a new revelation of Him and take you to higher places beyond your imagination! This year i pray He restores to you everything the canker-worm stole and cause you to thirst after Him more than ever! In Jesus name Amen. I hope you also keep me in your prays so that God will strengthen and keep me.